Menopause Support: Symptoms, Changes & Coping Strategies
My Story
At around 45, I had my womb, ovaries and cervix removed. This led to an immediate onset of menopause, often referred to as surgical menopause.
Unlike natural menopause, where hormones decline gradually, surgical menopause causes a sudden and dramatic drop in oestrogen. The symptoms can be intense, fast, and overwhelming.
I was prepared for some of them, but I was not prepared for what happened to my mind. You often hear the term “brain fog” during menopause. What I experienced felt far beyond that.
The changes affected:
Memory
Attention
Language
Processing speed
Executive function
I began forgetting basic information. I went to the pharmacy and forgot my own address. I would forget which way to turn at the traffic lights to get home.
Supermarket shopping became overwhelming. Even with a list, I could not match the words to the items in front of me, and I would walk up and down the aisles aimlessly. I forgot how to pack my bags at checkout, and I tried to pay with loyalty cards, until someone came to help me. One day, I stood in tears, staring at my shopping, unable to work out what to do next.
At work, I regularly chaired meetings with staff and customers. Suddenly, I struggled with everyday vocabulary, words disappeared mid-sentence, and sometimes I invented words without realising. My confidence, which I built over 30 years in my industry, collapsed.
My family feared I had dementia, and made an appointment at the GP. I underwent medical tests and failed them, but after more tests, dementia was ruled out.
Because of my trauma history, therapy was offered. I attended, even though I knew this felt hormonal, not psychological.
The anxiety around not understanding what was happening was almost worse than the symptoms themselves.
There is something deeply destabilising about losing trust in your own mind.
I tried to find information online, but it was described as brain fog, but what I and many others were describing was not brain fog; it felt debilitating, my personality was changing as my confidence grew less and less.
Suddenly, I doubted myself, I avoided meetings and customer visits, embarrassed at my lack of vocabulary. I questioned my competence. Confidence is not just about ability; it is about trust in yourself. When that feels unstable, everything feels unstable.
I knew I had to do something, even if that was just to help me remember and instil a little confidence.
I approached life as a project.
Structure reduced the anxiety.
Detailed Diary System
I began writing down everything I had to do that day, from making tea to posting parcels, literally everything.
Fixed Locations for Items
I made sure every drawer or cupboard made sense, and every object had a place.
If I lost something, I checked my notes.
Centralised Organisation
I taught myself to use Notion to store notes, set tasks, to-do lists, track tasks and routines
I used it for work as well as home.
Technology Support
I used ChatGPT to help with vocabulary, drafting and preparing for meetings.
Meeting Preparation
I wrote prompts for keywords I might forget, as well as people's names.
Journey Mapping
I detailed routes, parking, arrival times and contacts before travel.
Excessive planning removed all the uncertainty.
I started to trust myself again.
The biggest recovery was not physical. It was emotional.
I had to:
Accept that my brain was adapting
Stop catastrophising
Separate temporary symptoms from permanent identity
Rebuild self-trust
Confidence returned slowly, not perfectly. In fact, I am still not as confident as I was; I still forget and make up words, but I have accepted that it is now a part of me and laugh at myself.
I have adapted a lot, and instead of hiding behind the symptoms, I openly say sorry, I have forgotten the words today, my brain is on menopause meltdown.
Who This Page Is For
This page is for:
Women experiencing surgical menopause
Women navigating severe menopause symptoms
Those struggling with menopause-related memory loss
Women worried about cognitive decline or “brain fog”
Professionals trying to maintain confidence while symptoms affect work
Anyone feeling frightened by a sudden hormonal change
Important Note
This page is written from lived experience and informed by trauma-aware coaching training. It is designed to offer reflection, practical insight, and supportive guidance.
It is not medical, legal, or therapeutic advice and should not replace support from a qualified healthcare professional, therapist, or specialist.
If you are in immediate crisis, experiencing overwhelming distress, or feel unsafe, please contact a qualified mental health professional or emergency service. You can find details in the Professional & Crisis Support section opposite.
This content offers lived insight and trauma-informed perspective, but it is not a substitute for personalised clinical care.
Menopause Support: Symptoms, Impact & Guidance
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Menopause is the stage of life when a woman’s menstrual cycles permanently stop due to declining ovarian function and falling hormone levels, particularly oestrogen and progesterone.
It is officially diagnosed after 12 consecutive months without a period.
Menopause is not an illness.
It is a biological transition, but for many women, the symptoms can significantly affect physical health, mental health, work performance, relationships, and confidence.
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Natural Menopause
Occurs gradually, typically between ages 45–55. Hormones decline over several years.
Perimenopause
The transitional phase before menopause. Periods may become irregular. Symptoms can begin years before periods stop.
Common perimenopause symptoms:
Irregular cycles
Mood changes
Sleep disruption
Increased anxiety
Breast tenderness
Surgical Menopause
Occurs when the ovaries are removed surgically. Hormone levels drop suddenly, often leading to more intense symptoms.
Medical or Induced Menopause
Triggered by treatments such as chemotherapy, radiotherapy, or certain medications.
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Menopause affects nearly every system in the body.
Physical Symptoms
Hot flushes
Night sweats
Fatigue
Sleep disturbances
Joint pain
Headaches
Weight gain
Hair thinning
Dry skin
Vaginal dryness
Urinary urgency
Emotional & Psychological Symptoms
Mood swings
Anxiety
Irritability
Low mood
Loss of confidence
Emotional sensitivity
Cognitive Symptoms
Memory lapses
Difficulty concentrating
Word-finding problems
Slowed processing
Mental overwhelm
Sexual Health Changes
Reduced libido
Pain during intercourse
Decreased arousal
The Hormone-Brain Connection
Oestrogen influences:
Serotonin (mood regulation)
Dopamine (motivation)
Memory formation
Stress response
When hormone levels fluctuate or drop, brain chemistry shifts.
This explains why menopause can:
Trigger new anxiety
Worsen existing anxiety
Cause sleep issues
Affects cognitive clarity
Understanding this can reduce fear.
Your brain is adapting, not failing.
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Oestrogen plays a role in:
Memory processing
Neurotransmitter regulation
Brain cell protection
Blood flow to the brain
When oestrogen drops rapidly, the brain has to recalibrate.
This can cause:
Word-finding difficulties
Slowed processing
Forgetfulness
Difficulty concentrating
Overwhelm in busy environments
Many women experience this.
Few talk about it openly.
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Many women are not warned about the mental health impact of menopause.
Hormonal changes can:
Increase panic attacks
Trigger depressive episodes
Heighten emotional reactivity
Cause sudden tearfulness
Women with a history of trauma may find symptoms intensified, as hormonal changes affect stress regulation systems.
This does not mean you are “backsliding.”
It means your nervous system is adjusting.
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Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT)
Can relieve:
Hot flushes
Night sweats
Mood instability
Vaginal dryness
Cognitive symptoms
Always consult a GP or menopause specialist.
Nutrition Support
Protein for muscle preservation
Calcium & Vitamin D for bone health
Omega-3 for brain function
Reduced caffeine if anxiety worsens
Strength Training
Helps:
Bone density
Weight management
Confidence
Mood regulation
Sleep Hygiene
Consistent bedtime
Cooler room temperature
Reduced screen exposure before bed
Breathwork
Stress Regulation
Mindfulness
Gentle yoga
Walking
Journalling
Structured planning (as I implemented)
Cognitive Support Techniques
For memory issues:
Written checklists
Digital reminders
Voice notes
Repetition systems
Fixed storage locations
Meeting preparation
These are not signs of weakness.
They are adaptive strategies.
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Menopause can significantly impact professional women.
Challenges may include:
Loss of confidence
Reduced cognitive speed
Increased anxiety
Fatigue in high-pressure environments
Practical workplace strategies:
Prepare written prompts
Schedule demanding tasks earlier in the day
Allow short breaks
Communicate with trusted colleagues if safe to do so
Workplace menopause awareness is improving, but stigma still exists.
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Post-menopause increases risk of:
Osteoporosis
Cardiovascular disease
Vaginal atrophy
Metabolic changes
Regular monitoring is important:
Bone density scans
Blood pressure checks
Cholesterol tests
GP reviews
Menopause is not the end of health care.
It requires adjusted health care.
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I use HRT patches, which have helped.
Hormone Replacement Therapy can:
Reduce hot flushes
Improve sleep
Support cognitive clarity
Protect bone density
HRT is not suitable for everyone, and decisions should always be made with a medical professional.
But for me, it provided relief.
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When the ovaries are removed, oestrogen production drops rapidly.
This sudden hormonal change can trigger:
Hot flushes
Night sweats
Vaginal dryness
Mood fluctuations
Fatigue
Sleep disturbances
Reduced libido
Bone density loss
Weight changes
Joint pain
Hair thinning
Cognitive impairment
Many women are prepared for hot flushes and night sweats.
Far fewer are warned about the cognitive effects.
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Beyond immediate symptoms, surgical menopause increases risks such as:
Osteoporosis
Cardiovascular changes
Ongoing cognitive shifts
Mood instability
Monitoring is important.
Annual check-ups matter.
Bone scans matter.
Blood tests matter.
Do not ignore long-term health
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This page is for:
Women experiencing surgical menopause
Women navigating severe menopause symptoms
Those struggling with menopause-related memory loss
Women worried about cognitive decline or “brain fog”
Professionals trying to maintain confidence while symptoms affect work
Anyone feeling frightened by a sudden hormonal change
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What age does menopause usually start?
Most women experience menopause between 45 and 55, but perimenopause can begin in the early 40s.
How long does menopause last?
Symptoms may last 4–10 years. Some women experience symptoms for longer.
Is severe memory loss normal in menopause?
Cognitive changes are common. Severe or sudden changes should always be medically evaluated.
Does menopause cause anxiety?
Hormonal shifts can increase anxiety, even in women without prior history.
Can you have menopause without hot flushes?
Yes. Symptoms vary widely.
What is the difference between perimenopause and menopause?
Perimenopause is the transition phase; menopause is diagnosed after 12 months without periods.
How long does menopause brain fog last?
It varies. Some experience temporary symptoms, while others have longer adjustment periods. Hormone therapy and lifestyle changes may help.
Does HRT help with memory?
Some women report improvement in cognitive clarity with HRT. Medical guidance is essential before starting treatment.
Can surgical menopause be worse than natural menopause?
Yes. Because hormones drop suddenly rather than gradually, symptoms can be more intense.
Should I worry about dementia?
Always consult a GP if concerned. Many menopause-related cognitive symptoms mimic dementia but are hormone-related.
What lifestyle changes help?
Sleep prioritisation
Balanced nutrition
Strength training for bone density
Stress reduction
External memory systems
Structured routines
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If you are struggling with severe menopause symptoms:
Speak to your GP
Request referral to a menopause specialist
NHS 111 for urgent advice
Organisations:
British Menopause Society
Women’s Health Concern
NHS menopause guidance
If you are experiencing severe distress:
Samaritans 116 123
Final Words
Menopause can feel destabilising; it can challenge your confidence, your body, and your mind.
But it is not a personal failure; it is a biological transition.
You are not losing yourself, you are just adapting to change.
With knowledge, medical support, structure, and compassion, stability returns.
It shook my confidence, it frightened me, it forced me to adapt.
But with structure, support, medical care, and persistence, I stabilised.
If you are walking through this stage of life and feel confused, frightened, or diminished, you are not weak.
You are adapting to a profound biological shift.
And you are still you.
“If this page spoke to you, I’d love to hear from you. You don’t have to do this alone.”
Whether you have a question, want to share your own experience, or simply need to feel heard, you’re welcome to get in touch. Contact Me
Continue Reading: Emotional & Identity Support During Menopause
Menopause is not just physical. It can affect mood, memory, identity, and self-worth in ways many women are unprepared for.
If you’re struggling with emotional changes, confidence shifts, or feeling unlike yourself, you may find these articles helpful:
Blog Self-Awareness Blog Self-Acceptance Blog Change & Transformation Blog Emotional Healing Blog Building Self-Worth
If Menopause Has Stirred Up Deeper Feelings
For some women, menopause can intensify unresolved stress, trauma, or long-held self-doubt. If this resonates, you may also find support in these areas:
Narcissistic & Emotional Abuse Support
Stillbirth & Child Loss Support
If you’re ready to move beyond understanding and begin actively rebuilding confidence and emotional resilience, explore my trauma-informed workbooks and guided journals. Available in digital and physical formats.
For more in-depth, structured learning, explore my growing range of trauma-informed courses designed to support long-term healing and self-development.